{change}.

Change is one of the hardest things for me. I get it from my mom. We're both very emotional and get anxious when things start to unravel in our lives. We like plans and we like to know things. For a while, I thought this was a good problem to have. It's good to be consistent and steady right? It's good to want to be in the know. It's good to want constancy in your life. Well, yes and no.

I don't like change because I can't control it. I don't know the plan. So I don't know if I'll be okay or if things will work out. God says He knows the plans He has for us (Jeremiah 29:11) and His ways our higher than our ways (Isaiah 55:8).

So we shouldn't be afraid.
"Be strong and courageous. Do not be frightened, and do not be dismayed, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.” - Joshua 1:9

And we shouldn't hang on to our own plans because they're comfortable or because we want to be in control.
"Many are the plans in the mind of a man, but it is the purpose of the Lord that will stand." - Proverbs 19:21

But we should hang on to the consistency of God.
"For I the LORD do not change; therefore you, O children of Jacob, are not consumed." - Malachi 3:6

It's comforting to know that in the midst of staggering changes and unstable circumstances that we have a God who never changes. And we will not be consumed by what feels overwhelming and shaky.

My family moves to Austin, TX tomorrow where they will probably remain for many years to come. It's scary to finally be on "my own" with my family thousands of miles away. It's scary for my mom to think she has to start her life over. It's scary to not know the everyday routine of her life. But it's mind-blowing to know that this is God's way and He will be with my family wherever they go. 

{a chapter closing}

Tomorrow I graduate with a Master of Accounting from UNC-Chapel Hill. Tomorrow I officially and ceremoniously close a chapter of my life that has been so full of growth.

I started my time at UNC with a lot of fear. I feared being alone, being away from home, not fitting in, and of course failing all my classes {like everyone else}. I told God I trusted Him, but I really didn't. After a difficult first semester I was ready to transfer, but God knew better. He gave me some of the best friends I've ever had. I also grew so close to my suite mates. And I got plugged into a campus ministry and began to grow at UNC.

 some of my best friends. Ami, Cassie, Joni.

 me and Joni.

God gave me the best suite mates in the world.

Sophomore year was full of changes. I left my former campus ministry to join Cru where I met lifelong friends who would be my bridesmaids. I began my involvement at the Kenan-Flagler Business School and ended up winning an accounting case competition, which solidified me a job at a Big 4 firm that summer. I am amazed by how The Lord provided for me and directed each of my steps along the way. When you're going through life, it's really hard to understand God's plan, but looking back it's so clear that God's hand is over everything.

friends from Cru at the annual hoedown.

my xTax case competition team, in DC where we competed.

The end of sophomore year marked the beginning of a new chapter. Matt and I discovered I could graduate a full year early, and after having dated for 4 years we wanted to toy with the possibility of getting married in a year. It was crazy to most people, and rushed. But we felt God's calling. Matt proposed the August before my Junior/Senior year.

in St. John with Matt before he proposed.

Back at school, being newly engaged was weird. I had to juggle being present for my last year at UNC while preparing for my future marriage. I felt pretty confused with where God wanted me to focus my efforts and how to best use my last year at UNC. In a way, I feel like I took that last year for granted. All my friends had one year left, and I technically did as well (grad school), so I didn't let it all sink in that I would be graduating.

Moving in to my last apartment at UNC.

my last roomies at UNC.

So when I graduated that year and knew I would be coming back for grad school I thought nothing much would change. I took a gap year to work for a public accounting firm and again grew immensely. I loved my job and my co-friends :) It was weird though, everything in my mind was temporary until I got back to school. My friends and my heart were there. Matt and I joined a small group where we lived. We formed a new life together and struggled with how to do this thing called marriage. We fought, but we grew. And we learned how to be selfless.

graduation would not have happened without the love & support of my family.

newlyweds.

christmas ugly sweater day at work.

I left my job to come back to Carolina this past August. I was so excited to be back where God had worked on me and changed my life so much. It was hard being there and not having all my best friends at my side, but it helped wean me off of UNC a bit. This whole year I've been preparing to leave and sadly not come back. As I look forward to what lies ahead, I'm excited but sad. I can't wait to see what God does in my career, but I also have to say goodbye to a place I called home for 4 years and officially close the chapter of UNC in my life.

my audit team in the MAC program.

MAC friends :)

UNC changed me in a way unlike others. I wasn't always obsessed with the place. Sometimes I hated it and longed for home. Sometimes I loved it because I was surrounded by my best friends. I wasn't a die-hard sports fan or a sentimental Old Well lover. But as I look back at my time at UNC, I realize that I love it because it's where God met me and changed me. It was God's best tool for me at that time in my life. UNC was a place God knew He could challenge me and draw me closer to Him.

& that is why I will forever love UNC. Tomorrow I'm going to soak up the moment, thank God for where He's taken me, and look forward to what He has in store for me in the future.